Thirty

In a few days, I'll be thirty. I'm not going to lie and say I'm all cool with it. I'm really not. I figured it would be alright, just another number, but that is completely not how I really feel.

I'm scared. Don't misunderstand, I've accomplished a lot with my life, I'd like to think. I just keep thinking about the things I didn't accomplish. I didn't finish school, which has a direct effect on how much money I make. I know there's still time, but I had these lofty goals to reach by now.

College education, own a house, have 3 kids. None of which has turned out right. I'm blissfully happy with the two kids I have, but I always saw myself with 3. I'll be discussing that at a later date.

I sort of feel like a failure, in some ways. I'm not doing what I thought I'd be doing. I'm sure this feeling will pass, but not until after I hit the big 3-0.